My first year of college has been the most challenging academic year of my life and has not been easy on my neurodivergent ADHD mind, yet something I’ve found very comforting is a 45-minute drive to see my family. 

College is hard, and by living on campus, sometimes I feel like I can’t escape the thing that consumes my mind the most. 

I don’t hate college. It’s just difficult to “stop overanalyzing” my academic success while I’m here.

My workload is constant, but I really can’t complain because thats what college is all about–the never ending workload until a degree. 

I know it’s something that many college students don’t like to admit, but the “gravitational pull of home” is strong. 

For the last 19 years of my life, I’ve always been home when I’ve felt stressed and needed comfort, but the last nine months have been utter hell. 

After every bad day, every long day and every happy day, I got to greet the people I love the most. But now, I greet the 16×16 that is my current living situation. 

The hardest part of adapting to college was that I didn’t get to see them every day, and even though I’ve gotten over that initial feeling, I still miss them.

Although I missed them, this was also when I needed independence, which is just a part of life.

When things pile up, or I’m about to pull every hair on my head out, I find so much solace in heading back home to decompress. 

I love to sit on my couch and talk with my mom, and I love to sit and watch old “Blue Bloods” reruns with my dad. 

In both scenarios, we always end up falling asleep, but that’s what I love about it. 

I also love to have the occasional lunch or crawfish boil with my grandma and grandpa or even spend the day with my nana and papaw. 

Since my college career began, I have craved being around my family, and I hate that I took so many years for granted with the people who have shaped me into the person I am today. 

I find myself yearning for a hug from my parents and sister, or a kiss on the cheek from any of my grandparents. 

It’s even harder that I no longer see my sister, who used to live two blocks from my school. 

I miss the days I could drive to her apartment after a day at school, and it’s been hard finding a way to manage this longing. 

While a phone call or a text message will do the trick, it’s hard to pull my mind away from the tangle it’s in, with a new knot composing every hour. 

I go home once or twice a month, sometimes more or less. However, I’ve found that I can regain my focus after a weekend with the people I love most. 

On a Friday night when I have nothing to do — granted I can break away — I’ll go home for the weekend and have a relaxing getaway. 

It’s not easy being in college, but I’ve found that I enjoy being close to home and the luxury of that 45-minute drive.