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‘Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da’
Famously called “granny music” by John Lennon, “Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da” nearly led to a physical altercation in the recording studio between Paul McCartney and Lennon, who was frustrated at how long McCartney was spending working on it. Lennon had the right instincts, because “Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da” is one of the most grating tracks the Beatles ever produced. The bouncing bass line and jangly piano make it sound like circus music and the chorus is profoundly annoying with its multi-tracked, pitched-up vocals. And talk about boring lyrics. I could not care less about Desmond and Molly, the subjects of the song. “Granny music” is right.
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‘Now and Then’
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“Now and Then,” billed as the final Beatles song ever, is just another marketing stunt. Assembled from a demo that Lennon wrote and recorded in 1977, seven years after the Beatles split up, the song also has new vocals and bass from McCartney and new drums and vocals from Ringo Starr, whose drumming sounds phoned-in and uninspired. The music video, consisting of archival footage of the Fab Four and recent footage of the surviving two, is truly unhinged. There are several deeply uncanny scenes of the 80-something Starr and McCartney edited to look like they’re singing next to young Lennon and George Harrison.
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‘One After 909’
“One After 909” stands out as a boring choice for their final album, “Let It Be.” McCartney and Lennon wrote the song in the earliest days of the band when they were called The Quarrymen, but they shelved it for several years. It isn’t especially bad, it’s just an early rock-n-roll-style Beatles song, of which there are several albums already. They could have left this one in the vault and “Let It Be” wouldn’t have suffered. It sort of brings things full circle, but doesn’t see the band experimenting and fails to reach the sonic height or emotional depth found elsewhere on “Let It Be.”
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‘Yellow Submarine’
Written as a children’s song by McCartney and Lennon and then thrown to Ringo as his one vocal spot on “Revolver,” “Yellow Submarine” is probably most enjoyed by children. It brings “Revolver,” an otherwise mostly perfect album, to a grinding halt, which is unforgivable. “Yellow Submarine” just plods along, overstaying its welcome despite being barely over two-and-a-half minutes long. It’s probably a controversial pick for this list, but “Yellow Submarine” just doesn’t hit like it did when I was a 5-year-old. The 1968 animated movie of the same name, though, is wonderful and worth a watch for any Beatles fan.
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‘Don’t Pass Me By’
Ringo’s first solo composition and another pick from the “White Album,” “Don’t Pass Me By” is a stilted, country-twinged number about a love lost. The warbling piano and jumpy, jaunty fiddle that plays throughout the song make it sound like it belongs in an old western saloon, not on a Beatles album. It’s also very long for a Beatles song, coming in at just under four minutes long, with Ringo singing his heart out over the lumbering piano the entire time. It’s endearing and I don’t like to trash Ringo; it’s just a forgettable Beatles track. It was a number-one hit in Denmark, though.