There’s a difference between treating yourself and over-compensating. I treat myself when I’ve accomplished something I’ve been working on for a long time or when I’ve had a rough day.

When I say I treat myself, I mean I spend a few dollars on a $5 cup of coffee or $10 tacos. Occasionally, after I’ve saved up money for a while, I’ll treat myself to a new shirt or something similar. The catch is that I never spend beyond my means.

While treating oneself means something different to each individual, I do think there’s an unhealthy line that can easily be crossed with “treat yourself” culture. 

By this I mean that sometimes people treat themselves too often. If you’re buying yourself a new pair of jeans or dropping $150 or more on hair appointments all the time, it doesn’t make it a treat. In that case, it becomes a bad habit. 

I’ve known people who immediately drop a load of money on new shoes when they are slightly inconvenienced by life. Specifically, I know someone who recently bought two pairs of shoes when they got sad, and then a week later bought another pair when they were sad again. 

Buying things just for the sake of trying to temporarily fulfill emotional needs is unhealthy. When someone just swipes away at their card all the time, they build a dependency on spending money for superficial happiness. 

Over-splurging on anything, whether it be food, accessories, clothing, etc. can easily become self-destructive behavior, especially when that money is being taken away from spending on the necessities in life. 

You don’t need a whole new wardrobe just because you’re upset. Spending mass amounts of money on unnecessary items is just over-compensating for your feelings. There are other ways to cope with emotions more healthily. 

I don’t mean to say that someone can never spend a chunk of change on something they want. I just think that people need to think about their big purchases instead of buying on a whim. These compulsive buys add up quickly when you’re not careful. 

Treating yourself is better off when it’s actually an occasional treat. There are also plenty of free ways to go about treating yourself. 

When I need to treat myself but know I shouldn’t spend any money, I’ll do things I’ve put off like reading a book that’s been on my list for a while. When I crave coffee but know the extra $5 should be put toward gas instead, I’ll make a coffee at home because it’s not something I do every day. 

Another easy way I treat myself without spending is by taking a walk and listening to music or a podcast as I do so. If I’m feeling it, I’ll even invite a friend to join me. 

It’s easy to get caught up in treating yourself any time you feel like life goes wrong, but it doesn’t make it right. There are better ways to handle emotions that don’t include self-destructive behaviors.